September is Dystonia Awareness Month
Since September is Dystonia Awareness Month, I thought I’d do my part to raise awareness by sharing some of journal entries.
I found these written on my computer. I have them organized in a file named “Dystonia Diary.” If I had plans to keep that up, I must have forgotten or given up on that effort.
I’ll just list them out:
Tues., May 23, 2017
Day 1 of our trip to Boulder and my first impression is of nausea. Actually, I felt dizzy and nauseated as the plane descended in Denver Airport. I felt so tired and dizzy that I tested whether I could move both hands to make sure I wasn’t having another stroke. I wasn’t.
As always, the view of the mountains as we drove toward Boulder was welcoming. We’re actually staying at the Quality Inn in Broomfield. Less expensive than Boulder, but close enough.
We had afternoon coffee at Peet’s. You can see the Flatirons from the coffee shop. We also had dinner at a place on Pearl Street mall. I had a bean burrito. Ella has grown so much! She’s so cute!
Wed., May 24, 2017
Breakfast at the motel and cappuccino at Peet’s with a spectacular view of the Flatirons.
Every time we pass the road to Golden West, I think of Mom.
Went up the road into the mountains and re-created (kinda) our awesome photo from years ago.
We bought our first legal weed product ever. Chocolate with a 50–50 THC/CBD proportion. It helped my pain.
Lunch was a great sandwich and chocolate malt from Snarf’s. It was also dinner.
Hit two record stores.
Thu., May 25, 2017
Had lunch at The Egg and I, named for the book. I had avocado toast and scrambled eggs. Delicious.
Took a walk on the Boulder path and through U of C campus.
Watched Dogma with Kenny and Karen. Funny as hell. Had no idea that Kevin Smith wrote and directed it.
Observed Towel Day with a towel pic on Instagram.
*****
Okay, at that point, the entries for May 2017 stop completely.
I have a lot more written in notebooks, let me tell you.
In the interest of good sense, I’ll skip the entry where I express my every awful thought about the screenplay for Network.
Yes, I always loved that famous scene about “going to the window” and so on, but really … William Holden is really going to leave his wife for the bitch who, essentially, muscled him out of his job?
Okay, enough. That’s not even about dystonia, right?
So, next …
So, then we jump right to …
Tues., Aug. 28, 2018
Did the most amazing thing today. I went to Kernan for a re-eval of my leg exercises. We started with an overall assessment of my strength, balance, etc. And I actually managed to stand on one foot for either 10 or 30 seconds — sad that I can’t remember.
It was my good foot, of course, instead of my dystonia-turned foot, but even so!
When you’re whole left side has dystonia, balance on one foot is fucking tricky.
I did a bunch of exercises to test my abilities — and did them all without falling over. Awesome.
We watched Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri. Great movie! I just started reading the script. So glad I waited to do that. I’m loving it all over again.
There are a bunch I’m skipping here. Let’s just go to the following year …
Here’s January 2019 verbatim:
Sat. 1/5/19 12:30 a.m.
It’s the end of a decade — a new year and all that. Hurray.
I just got back from nearly a week in the beautiful Pacific Northwest. What a great time we had, despite the lack of relief I got from my latest round of Botox injections for dystonia.
But I managed to hike like you wouldn’t believe. And that was awesome.
More to come.
Sun. 1/6/19 12:22 a.m.
I keep wanting to write details of our trip, while they’re semi-fresh in my mind. I’ll get to it.
My hand feels as clenched as ever. My foot is also quite clenched. But I managed to clean my small side table today.
I also plowed thru a gazillion emails. Delete, delete, delete.
And time’s up. Again. 🙂
Sun. 1/6/19 (later)
If doing the hardest thing first is the best thing, then I’m right to read my email first in the morning. Get it out of the damn way. [I actually just skim it now, and do the serious reading later.]
What I need is a routine for writing, balanced with social media. Plus a plan for marketing my online courses.
I also need to prioritize screenwriting vs. prose writing vs. blogging. I think working up scheduled blog posts would help with that.
But first — Amazon and BookBub ads. I need to focus on them. [Except now I don’t.]
I also need to learn Vellum. Allegedly, it’s not hard. [It has a bit a learning curve, but it’s manageable.]
Mon. 1/7/19
Got to record more video. For the plotting class and the YouTube channel.
Got to set up “Wayward Lawyer” page. [Assuming I haven’t given up on that bit.]
Got to figure out where to blog about travel. Should I start on R&S Things?
Should I post something on Wattpad?
Wed. 1/9/19
Tomorrow, my chipped front tooth gets fixed. It will not be a major writing day.
Oh, and my cell phone fucking died. That was a joy. Guess I’ll be calling Apple. For what that’s worth.
I began slipping in references to the FET (Female Engagement Teams). I think it’ll give Erica more of an investigative background.
It’ll be interesting to see whether I can save my phone or I need to buy a new one. This is why depending on a smartphone isn’t necessarily the smartest thing to do.
Thu. 1/10/19
So, the cell phone lives! Isn’t that nice?
My tooth was fixed. All is right with the world again. Except, of course, there’s still no “magic fix” for my dystonia.
And I should write something about my vacation. For the blog. One of them. 🙂
I wish I remembered to take more pictures of my food. I’ll never make a decent travel blogger (assuming that’s what I want to be) unless I snap a pic before I devour the subject.
Fri. 1/11/19
Just a few lines. At some point, I should write something about my vacation, which was awesome, but requires description and so on and typing words … sigh.
There’s never enough time for anything.
Mon. 1/14/19
Two lines. That’s all I have time for.
I’m thinking of putting a pause on social media — maybe for up to a year. Just go quiet and stay off and see if I’m really more productive.
Tue 1/15/19
Today, I really focused on revising my feature screenplay. Seemed like I was on a roll, but I keep feeling like I don’t quite have it yet. The story keeps changing in these weird, kaleidoscopic ways.
But, I’m writing and that’s important.
I have to finish as fast as I can.
I need to figure out how to handle the social media hiatus.
Fri. 1/18/19
Well, I’m announcing the social media hiatus this weekend. That includes an announcement in my newsletter which means I’ll have to mention it on YouTube.
As for my promos, I’m avoiding Twitter and Facebook. Google Plus is being shut down. [Remember Google Plus? Yeah, another online thing that came and went.] And LinkedIn — I can take it or leave it. [Actually, LinkedIn has become much more interesting lately.]
My massive reading on the FET program and women in the military has helped greatly. I now have sights and smells to go with the other images I had of Afghanistan and Iraq.
Bagram Air Base sounds … bizarre. It’s been built up like a “new urban” village, complete with Main Street (referred to colloquially as “Disney Row”). Fast food, traffic — like a suburb in the middle of nowhere.
And both books I’ve read recently refer to a jeep and a chopper. So, those terms seem to still be okay.
Sat. 1/20/19
So … social media hiatus is on. I’ve even done a video about it.
And now I have to do a newsletter about it. I also have to remind my Street Team to please remember to post a review of the book they got for that purpose.
Another day of cleaning off one little spot in my office.
I also need to buy cardstock paper (or whatever it’s called) to use with my script submission.
Plus … more things.
So many more things.
Sun. 1/21/19
I just saw the full moon in complete eclipse. That was amazing.
It looked like a small roundish smear in the sky.
I’ve actually received payment from Kobo. And it’s more than I made on Amazon, which is extremely interesting.
Mon. 1/22/19
So today I made fine little changes to the prologue and first chapter of Damaged Goods. Then I got to her studio apartment in Chapter 3. And I realized I had no idea what it looked like. So … I pulled up all manner of apartment layouts (especially studios) on Google Images. And with images in DuckDuckGo. I still need to sit down and freaking draw it out. Just to solidify the damn place in my mind.
I suspect not all the changes I make to this story will be this aggravating. It’s like … okay, who is this person? Where does she live? How does she live? Etc., etc.
Books to read, scripts to read. Blah, blah.
Tue., 1/23/19
Short screenplay submitted to contest. Mission accomplished.
Question: do I want the group to take another look at my short film or show them Act 1 of the feature? My feeling is probably the latter.
Wed. 1/24/19 2:01 a.m.
One of those rare sleepless nights. I thought I’d read, but decided to write instead.
Just started a book on how we have more time than we think and the first chapter just went on and on and I wasn’t sure whether to continue or stop. Before I wasted a lot of time on a book that seemed to point out stuff that didn’t apply to me.
I get tired of people who write things like, “Exercise every day and eat right, and you can stay healthy.” Gee, that didn’t work for me.
My impulse is to write: “Liar!”
The comfort of lies and avoidance keeps most people sane. I suspect.
Enough … maybe I will read. Just not that book.
Sun. 1/27/19
The weekend was spent mostly 1) learning Vellum, which is totally cool; 2) putting the finishing touches on my Thinkific online courses. Still a few things to tinker with and then I can launch the courses.
I watched a really cool documentary, which I’ve reviewed on another blog. Five stars, baby!
I started reading the screenplay for Reservoir Dogs. Quentin Tarantino writes like a dream. Dialogue to die for.
I’ve put together a basic set of my first three novels, which I’ve uploaded to Kobo. Now, trying to decide whether to make it Kobo-exclusive or available on Kobo, Apple, and others.
Mon. 1/28/19
It’s supposed to get really cold in the next few days. Yuck!
Managed to record, edit and upload the Crime Cafe interview for this week. Maybe I should focus on teaching people how to edit video for purposes other than movie-making. I don’t know.
Done for now.
Tue. 1/29/19
I managed to create and share on my newsletter my Rafflecopter giveaway for my new boxed set — Law Can Be Murder.
Okay, so it’s not new. It’s new-ish, at at any rate.
Plus, I just got a bunch of codes people can use to get free audio copies of Invisible Me.
Now, that merits some giveaways.
*****
So that’s where I’m at as of the end of January 2019.
And I’m still cleaning my office. Very, very slowly.
*****
What’s really interesting is how much my approach to all this stuff has changed since I wrote these words.
Basically, I just do what I can, at the pace that I can.
So, anyhow … there’s more I could write here. But, as usual, I’m out of time and energy.
More to come … I suppose. 🙂