Amazon Purchases Rhode Island (A Totally Satirical Post)

Warning: This is a totally satirical post, as I said in the headline. So, believe me when I say that NONE of this is true, okay? Okay … here we go! :)

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In the top of the fake news today, Amazon inked a deal to purchase the State of Rhode Island.

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In a press conference announcing the deal, Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos was tight-lipped with respect to his plans for the property.

“We’re considering all our options,” Bezos stated, refusing to explain further.

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Sources within the company (who preferred to remain unnamed) revealed in an exclusive interview that, “We’ll either create a planned community serviced by Amazon-owned businesses or build the world’s only Amazon-only shopping mall.”

An Amazon spokesperson denied fake Internet rumors of plans to purchase Connecticut and convert it to an Amazon warehouse.

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Originally published on .

New York Times bestselling author of seven novels, including the Sam McRae Mystery series. Screenwriter, podcaster, and blogger. My website: .

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